Advice With Online Gaming So Far 7-30-10

Sup guys.. been gamin' gamin' gamin' :) The whole week!! I've learned a lot from it… I was finally able to convert a girl I met online into an actual day2. Very excited for tonight :). I have also about 2-3 more potential day2s, 3 Facebook friends, and about 7 girls I'm still gaming on the website, OKCupid.com.

Here's what I've encountered and learned so far:

#1) Rejection happens. Just go to the next and next and next. Force yourself not to even think about a possible rejection, just make hundreds of options for yourself. Guys with options = Winners.

I've sent about 174 messages on this website.. all to girls I thought were pretty hot (and if they weren't .. well I got tricked initially by a good myspace angle shot). That said, I got rejected a LOT. The worst that can happen is that they don't respond. This is actually quite common…

#2) Indirect wins over Direct. Situational is okay, but Astrology wins. Make your messages SHORT.

At first about 50 of my messages were 'direct', traditional copy and paste stuff… very AFC almost:

I wrote things like:

"Hey I thought you were really adorable. I wanted to message you and tell you that… hope you message back! - Cloud".

Out of 50 responses, I got 49 rejections -- no response. Wow! Lucky number 1 was a prostitute, who wanted me to view her pics online at xxx website. Yay!

Bottom line: Direct isn't a good strategy for online game, unless you like blowing out a lot. Fuck blowing out… I want some fucking pussy!

So I changed it up. I started going indirect, and asking what sign they were. Not a good strategy at first. The astrology information was on the profile. As a result, I asked them if they were into their sign and truly believed in it.

It worked. I got my first response from a Korean chick. She's the one I'm seeing today.

Cool, I thought. Let's do this some more….

I sent out more copy/pastes asking if the girl believed in her sign. It wasn't that effective. I guess because it was copy & paste. So I began customizing the message to the girl based on observations I saw in her photo or profile.

Like one girl who messaged back.. "I said to her, you're a Virgo. I hear Virgos are pretty crazy about being neat and tidy.. your pics look neat and tidy.. but are you or do you not believe in that stuff at all? - Cloud"

She thought it was pretty funny. She wrote back that she was in fact tidy.

A couple more girls wrote back when I made observational statements that were kind of 'teasing' like this message… and if I could tie it somehow to their 'sign'.

Typical responses were: "Hahaha… Yeahhh I am like that.. how did you know? Are you a psychic?" "OMG, that's so me. Do you study astrology or something?"

Bottom line: Indirect with observations somehow tied to astrology work MUCH better than direct. It works even better if you add in a bit of a 'neg' or so. It should be teasing.

After a while, I began mixing it up again.. I was sorta getting bored of being an 'astrologer' and repeating the same thing to so many different girls. It felt like I got the same old response each time… and it becomes annoying when you find out how many girls fall into the same pattern…

I started skimming through girls' profiles and just finding things that stood out that I could tease them on. Sometimes it would be a picture of them doing something ridiculous or other times I would comment on their writing style. It worked also… but probably not as effective overall (I spent a good deal of messages just doing this). I probably sent like 100 messages this way. For the most part, girls who responded back would laugh and say yeah 'such and such observation is true'.

I felt to me.. it was better to be natural overall and open situational, because the conversations after would free-flow instead of trap me into a 'psychic' frame. Still, for both openers - astrology opener and situational opener, I did a good job later of steering conversation into a good close.

Over a period of time, I encountered a problem… girls not responding back to situational observations. Why? I thought..

It was because my messages began to get long. I would not only make observations, but I'd guess so much about them that was possibly 'right' they felt not compelled to write back -- maybe because I came off too 'all knowing' - which was borderline creepy.

My theory is sorta supported because I went back to making short observations and just opening with that. They were way more effective.

To date I have had about 15 girls who have responded back and I'm in some sort of conversation … (which isn't bad considering a week ago I had no girls in my life). Of the 15, 6 or 7 of them came from short observational openers. The rest were astrology, and possibly 2 or 3 came from observational statements.

Bottom line: Be short, make observational statements but don't read their entire life aloud to them. You want to be teasing about it too.. because they need to 'win you'.. so it's like a qualifying short observational statement. If you can tie it to astrology -- your chances work way better in your favor -- cause most girls fall into patterns.

Okay one last thing about observational statements.

#3) Stereotype & Remember Patterns.

Yes, I know this is like WTF advice. But it works so well. If you think a girl is like a 'certain' type of girl, I am 90% sure she'll be that type of girl and you can make an opener out of it. If not, at least you can use the 'stereotype' to your advantage in gaming her -- you'll know she fits within whenever she falls into certain patterns someone of that stereotype would do.. And if you mess up on your stereotype, you can write it down as a possible 'exception' to the pattern you're working on -- that 10% and avoid it with the next girl.

For example:

I game a lot of Asian American chicks. Stereotypical Asian American chicks get pissed off if they think you're gaming them because they're 'Asian'. Even if you know some cool DHV like Japanese language or watch Korean drama, and try to make a connection with them based on that premise -- they won't connect with you -- stereotypically. It's a turnoff. Forget the fact that it's super cool you took interest to learn something about another culture -- they don't see it that way, they see it as you being creepy. :/ So don't bring it up when you first talk to them. Instead subtle it in.. piece by piece. Talk to her about something and make fun of how the situation reminds you of something cultural -- from her culture. If she bites, talk some more and ask another 'cultural' question. If you get a negative response, you know how much of her own 'culture' she tolerates and doesn't tolerate.

Some chicks love their culture. Others don't. Stereotypically, Asian Americans are about 50% into it, and 50% not. Sounds pretty obvious. Most likely, they know their food and the language, but on the other hand, they don't speak it at home and do lots of 'white girl' stuff like shopping and being trendy. You'll probably never meet a chick who's 100% into her own culture -- EXCEPT some Indian girls. Indian girls are sorta scary like that. In that case, you better have a strong desire to know about India and show you can learn the ropes. Otherwise you're not getting in.

Stereotypically Asian girls want you to desire them like a white chick. They have some complex where they think you're probably looking at other girls too - and fear it's a white girl. Why?? There's some inferiority complex built in.. it sucks, but you'll hear it in the shit tests. They want you to ONLY desire them. If they feel for an instant you're not being 'faithful' to your 'oh so true love' intention for them.. they get hella pissed.

The way to combat this pattern is to steer it in another direction before it grows into a monster. You know something's wrong based on the shit tests she throws out.. she'll ask you first, "Do you think that girl is hot?" Sometimes, she'll be sneaky and say "Oh this girl is so cute.. don't you agree?" Trap question. If you say "yes", she starts getting jealous. If you say "no", she thinks you're lying to her or maybe worse don't really like the kind of style she likes..

To handle, you just answer in a very romantic AFC way, saying "You know you're the only girl for me" and then break it as if it was really cheesy of you to say that by laughing off.. Gambler talks about this in his video 'Stealth Attraction'. Then you stack to something interesting -- for my Facebook chats with girls I met on OKC, I would talk about something I found they really liked -- one girl liked sports, another was into comedy so I'd just spam a youtube link… another was into rockabilly stuff, so I just kept teasing her with lady gaga junk, and another was into 'white food'.. so we have hamburger jokes. Actually with the white food girl…she almost hated me because I told her I was into Japanese curry, and she asked me if I was a Japanophile. She didn't like Japanophiles, so I called her out as an Americaphile with a fixation for hamburgers. It got her laughing and all was good again.

Stupid right? I stereotyped her as an Americaphile, but it was a stereotype she was willing to fall into. Sometimes you just gotta throw out stuff until you find what she likes.. and then the pattern is really easy. Even myself, I'm a self professed otaku, so with me, if you want to connect, just talk to me about games and anime. We all fall into patterns :) Girls more especially, because they think way more about these stereotypical things on an emotional level than guys do. That's why you gotta be careful the way you answer her shit tests.

So bottom line:

If you think she's what she looks and acts like -- she probably is. She's most likely going to fall for the same jokes and stuff the last girl like her fell for. Use that to your advantage.

Types of Patterns (Most common on OKC):

Angry rocker chick: Just be angry too. Talk about how you hate the world too in a short observational statement.
Asian chick: Don't go direct. They hate it. Bring only direct stuff after you've made a lot of teasing observations and cold read. Then treat her like she's the only one for you.
Bored chick: Make fun of her for being bored. Simple.
Fat chick: Ignore. You can 'waste' openers on them for fun.
Black/Latin/Hispanic: (Working on at moment). Just being sincere tends to work (sincere short observations that attract you) -- they are straightforward and don't like to think complex.
White chick: It depends. White chicks fall into so many different subcategories. There's the fat white chick. There's the nice white chick. There's the angry rocker chick like above. With each, just base it on what you think their personality is like.

Additionally, A TON of girls are influenced by the media and fall into stereotypical patterns there too. They believe a lot of the shit they hear in the news and are FAR too trusting about it. This is why Asian guys (myself included) have 'had' it so hard for the longest time in gaming chicks of other races. Almost all Asian girls have a place for a white guy in their heart, and/or a black guy has a big dick. You just have to make light of it. One girl asked me if I had an Indian accent. WTF? Just 'cause I'm Indian -- but yeah, that's because of shit she saw on TV. Another girl asked me why she should date me -- she's supposed to date other Koreans.

I made light of the situation by saying she was Harold, I was Kumar and we have to have each others' backs. I was able to relate it to something she had seen in the media and it made her laugh -- but it left a strong emotional connection to me later -- because she brings it up everytime we talk now. She calls me her 'Kumar'. :) Be able to make light of yourself and use stereotypes to your advantage -- over time the girls will realize you're more than just a stereotype -- but not in the beginning. No one has the time to learn all the complexities of your life when they first meet you -- a simple stereotype is good enough for them to want to remember you. A sexy stereotype would be most ideal -- and that's why the guys who look HOT on that site get more girls messaging back. If I did P90x -- oh man I'd be getting laid lots more. Still proud of my progress so far :)

#4) Be Subtle about Closing, BUT ALWAYS PUSH FOR A CLOSE - Use mini closes to your advantage. Asking for a close is an SOI and allows the girl to know you're still into her. If she senses you're not after a while… and the conversation is going nowhere… she's going to get bored and move on.

Linearly it would look like this:

See girl you like > Message her on something observational while teasing > Get her to agree > Find her pattern & stereotype accordingly > Continue rewarding stereotype with more 'stereotypical thread' > Ask for close. > If rejected go back a step, otherwise take close.

What kind of close? Talk to her about a potential date plan. Like saying "Oh we should so meet up for coffee sometime and talk about this more… any plans this weekend?"

I call this a feeler. Typically, she'll reject the first date idea you throw out. She'll say she's busy, or she's not yet ready.. whatever. Typically the root of it is that she's not yet feeling SAFE. Girls are WAY MORE PARANOID about meeting someone online than in real life. This is largely because of what they see in the media about girls getting raped and killed.

So use that pattern to your advantage. Throw out a couple date ideas. My friend Zar has a technique called 'Projecting' where he describes himself on a date with his target and them doing different fun things together. Gambler uses a similar technique where he describes a date idea with his target but then makes it more and more ridiculous until both he and his target bust up laughing.

The point is not to care about the actual date plan itself or being rejected -- the point is to have the girl imagine seeing herself with you on a date and doing different things. If you can make it fun, or funny and interesting.. she'll feel like she actually did go on a date with you -- and it was FUN. By mentally taking her on 'dates' you sorta make it easier for her to accept the next 'date idea'.

I did this a lot with the Korean girl I'm seeing today. I told her I wanted to take her out to the park and we could feed some ducks. After that we could drink some boba ice teas, and get some k-dramas and cry ourselves to bed.. she could teach me when the appropriate parts to cry or laugh were because I really don't know Korean. She really loved this idea.. and even though she initially rejected it -- she brought it up today when I asked her for her number. She's looking forward to having a drink with me and watching some k-drama at her place. Nice!

I also did this on a Japanese American chick I'm working. So far I've already mentally taken her on a very 'otaku' date that she laughed HARD at and rejected of course. But she definitely sees me as a date now .. not a friend and says stuff like "I'm probably going to end up going out with you if you keep this up.. :)" With her and the Korean, both my mental instadates involved us kissing at the end. That shit really turns the girl on.. :) Let her reject it.. it's the thought that counts and if she keeps talking you're good :)

Also ask for Facebooks. This helped me out a lot. Facebook is so great of a DHV because it keeps her occupied about you for hours -- when you can't or don't want to talk to her. You never want to reveal too much about yourself when you first meet a girl, rather it's fun to let her guess about you.. and then realize in a big way, you're kind of a big deal. Facebook is great for that because of all the social proof that goes on -- your friends commenting on stuff you say, the pictures of you at parties or faroff places, your work info -- whatever.

When she asks you about it later - you just downplay it and stack forward to that close -- cause it's so much more in grasp now than it was before.

#5) This is the last piece of advice and probably the most IMPORTANT. This advice comes from my Bartender instructor.

"Treat every patron who tips you like ROYALTY.. if they don't tip, you don't give a fuck about them." So if girls are messaging you back, you better treat them like they mean the world to you. Especially Asian chicks. If the girl isn't tipping though, move on to the next customer.

Whenever the girls I talk to come on Facebook, I make sure I say hi and just small talk for a bit. It doesn't matter if they don't talk to me for a long time or they're busy. It matters how I treat them. Over time, they warm up and they begin to give back in their own small way. You want to reward that with more conversation. Sometimes you can send them a Youtube link of something funny or a pic of yourself doing something stupid. The more personal, the better -- especially if it's a chance to know you on a better level.

That takes care of the 'safety' factor. If they feel like they know you, your chances of getting a number close or a real life meet are way better.

If a girl is just not responding to whatever you say, you can just call her out and give her some sort of warning in some qualifying way (as long as you are humorous and not some angry AFC this works). "You're kinda losing points..", "I'm gonna hold off on you…;) ", "I'm done talking to you for the night ;)".

Give her a chance to win you back. If she does, you reward. If she's like fuck you, INSTEAD of getting mad, just be polite and bow out. Don't even give her a chance to blame it on you … always make it seem like she was the one who was a bitch. You're the bartender, she's the bitch customer and you don't give a fuck about her. You want to treat the ones who tip you like royalty and next the ones who stick you.

I feel like I could make it even easier by saying this…

Women have power over men in that they can choose who they want to sleep with. This sucks.

However, men have the power to go to the next girl. :) Always remember that.

Women can say they have this power too.. but not really. Emotionally, they always get attached to one stupid dude. Women are prone to think emotionally not logically. However, us guys can think logically -- anytime we're in a crap relationship, we have the power to move on without the emotional attachment.

Remember that -- if you can tap into this .. and can show a woman you're willing to walk away anytime -- she'll feel it too. She'll begin thinking you're the 'prize' she needs to win, not the other way around. If you're a man with options, she'll feel like she's just another option in your life.. and HATE that. That's power :) Use it responsibly and above all be loving.

====

Alright hope these were some good tips. A quick recap for those of you who are ADD and skip.. there's 5 main points:

1) Face the rejection. Be able to start from scratch at anytime and create options for yourself. A man with options is a winner. A man with no options = LOSER.

2) For online, your best bet is to be short and sweet. Indirect & Astrology are your friends. Direct, not so much.

3) Stereotype to your advantage - take note to exceptions and keep in the back of your mind. Use the media to your advantage and steer conversation into patterns girls who fall into the stereotypes would like.

4) Always be closing', and be willing to make plans that get her to feel like she's already going out with you, even if they never happen - eventually she'll feel like she is comfortable enough and attracted enough to really want to do it. So have hundreds of plans in your arsenal and let her reject. As Magic said,"...it's her job to resist, your job to persist."

5) Be a bartender and reward loyal customers with extra service. They're the ones who deserve your time. Be able to move on to the next patron if they're not paying their dues to you. That's the true power of a man. :)

Above all -- PRACTICE. Do the steps above A LOT when you sarge. At first girls are going to call you out as someone who's calculating and trying to turn everything into a game. That's the obstacle to push past.. when you do this enough times.. it'll get fluid and feel natural. Then you don't have to worry about being 'calculating' anymore. Remember to keep pressing 'NEXT' if it doesn't work out. :)

Happy gaming!!

- Cloud

PS: Beware of the whales (fat chicks) who use "Myspace Camera Angle Tricks" to hide the fat. Don't do fat chicks, and don't spend your time whale watching :).

PSS: Oh yeah, if she's online on OKC and there's a let's chat button.. go for it. Don't even message her, just practice real time chat … it's great for weeding out chicks and getting girls who you really like to open up FAST.

What to Do if She Says Lets Just Be Friends First

Read this article today from DatingClass.com. It was a pretty good article on what to do if you're trying to seduce a woman and she says she wants to be friends first... Should you be her friend then? Or should you blow her out? Check out the story below:

"Let Just Be Friends First"

Yes, it is true that women very often ask for "friendship first" when the truth is, once you became a friend, they'd never be interested in you in a million years, ostensibly because they "don't want to wreck the friendship" code for, "You don't turn me on, you're like another woman to me, I have no sexual feelings for you." So why do they say they want friendship first ?

The truth is, it's all about safety. Remember, for a woman, safety is always a foremost concern. That's why we spend so much time talking about helping her feel safe with you. Men often ask us, "if women are so horny, like they often say they are, why don't they just go up to a guy and say, "let's have sex"? There are two reasons. First, a woman doesn't want to have sex with a "friend," as it will make her feel like a slut, because she knows her friend well, and will have to see him again. It's too real to her. On the other hand, she won't go up to a stranger and ask for sex, because a stranger could very well be dangerous . So she's in a bind...on the one hand, she can't have sex with a friend, without being reminded of her slutty behavior every time she sees you (thus "wrecking the friendship"), and on the other hand, she can't ask a stranger for sex, because of the very real and intelligent concern that he might end up being a violent psycho. This safety fear is much more present for women than you probably think.

So when she asks herself, "What kind of a man am I looking for?", she naturally wants one who is safe like a friend but still sexually attractive to her like a stranger. thus she says, "Friendship first." She doesn't want friendship, she wants to feel safe , yet excited . The problem is, most men who are good at making women feel safe do it by going the "friends" route, and end up never getting sex, just hearing about her sex with other men when she comes to him to cry about how bad some other guy is treating her.

The trick is to be willing to go slowly like a "friend" while at the same time making your romantic interest known right away, doing the flirting moves, conducting romantic conversations, and doing everything we talk about in the tape series. You may even tell a woman you want to go slowly, too, if this is true for you most of the best seducers know that being willing to go slowly, while still being romantic, is a great way to get women in bed.

The world of casual sex is much more dangerous for women than it is for men. She wants safety, and asks for friendship. If you can go slow and still be romantic, she will feel safe with you and excited by you, and you'll be off to the races!

Source: http://www.datingclass.com/seduction/friends-first.shtml


My Thoughts
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As I've been gaming online with OKC, I've come into a few chicks who have said this to me. It made me think, girls are 10x more paranoid about meeting a guy online than in a bar or at a club. Even if you're really cool, and you flirt back and forth with each other through email, they still have this general phobia and fear of adding you to their Facebook or giving you their phone number. It's like super scary to them. That's where I hear this line the most: "Let's Just Be Friends First".

She's in fear for her safety -- so even if you think you have something good going on, you generally need to talk to her for a while longer (maybe a couple weeks) before she'll eventually take one of your 'mini-close' suggestions; ie Facebook add or meet up for coffee. You also have to do your part to invite; if you don't.. she won't think you're interested in her, so she will move on to other guys who are talking to her. It doesn't matter if she rejects your plans, just keep making the plans and asking out while being 'safe'. In general, 'keep gaming' while being slow about it.. that's why this article above makes sense. Don't be 'just a friend' and don't 'blow her out'. You're not getting laid that way. Endure.

- Cloud

Doing A Fat Chick (Advice)

Haha.. As I explore OKcupid territory, I have been coming across a whole lot of 'whales' (fat chicks) - as my brother calls it. He tells me to stop 'whale watching' and go out and actually meet some hot women. I could.. but online game has been very educational and productive for me.

True, I don't like whale watching but... sometimes in the interest of pursuing higher education - (I want to practice Gambler's shit and know how to transition from online 'friends' to an actual date) -- I might end up doing a fat chick. ;) Here's some advice from a guy on Youtube who's a bartender YAY :). I lol'd pretty hard..



Then again... maybe it's not a good idea to do a fat chick... :P.

Why You Should Practice Sarging

Haha, saw this on Adam Lyon's FB.. so true :) GET UP AND SARGE!

The Do's & Don'ts of Dating

Thought this was a pretty good video by Love Systems. Haha.. I'm really impressed their Day Game coach is an Indian guy, and he's ranked #2 in top PUA in the world. GOOD JOB man!

Summer So Far 7-26-10

Hey guys… how's your summer been so far? Well.. mine has been both productive, and yet - unproductive. I don't want to be too hard on myself though.. I've been killing my state a lot with a lot of negative thinking.

That's the first thing I really wanna say before I go into standard fare. I know I've said this before, but I feel like I have to say it again: There are A LOT of dark days in between the successful days. Things don't go according to plan.. stuff fails, you get rejected, you settle for whatever.. not every day is paradise. Even days that could be seemingly paradise when you first started could seem like HELL later.. cause it gets boring. But above all, you HAVE to stay positive.. and believe that things are going to work out. It's so easy to just sit back and be frustrated… and I'm not gonna lie, sometimes I have been frustrated. But I never let myself sit too long.. I always try to talk myself into being cool; and if I can't.. I migrate to friends or a place that will make me laugh and be happy again. That's what friends are for…

Having a good, positive state will allow you to tackle the hard shit. You're gonna get plastered with shit from all kinds of people you meet in your day to day encounters (or night game encounters). You have to be able to take it. If you can't.. take a time out, then get back in. False Time Constraints for the win. Seriously. I can't game for hours on end.. I get really exhausted. Cold approaching endlessly sucks. You want a girl sometimes to fucking cold approach you. When you start feeling frustrated like that -- go do something else. Watch a movie with your friends. Go play some video games or eat some good food. Whatever.. just put yourself in a good mood again.. (and make sure you eat well too.. sometimes being hungry can make your game worse and make you sound incoherent -- my experience speaking). So to sum it up .. BE POSITIVE

---- Story Time - Regular Sarging at the Bar ----

Alright -- so story time now….

I've been sarging with Flex often. We go to different bars like Margarita Beach or Boiler Room. On the weekends I'll go to LA and solo sarge there. As you guys know, I've also been taking motorcycle lessons and studying bartending - to give myself sex appeal. Needless to say, I've been out … A LOT.

The fruits of my going out so far though have been -- STALE.

Bar game for me is pretty bad. Flex and I will go to the bar, but we'll stand around a lot. It's not cause we have AA; I think it's mostly we're just sizing up all the girls in our mind first -- thinking …"Hmm.. wtf should I say? I don't want this set to go bad.. so I gotta be clever.." This is usually followed by me and Flex discussing which girls seem like bitches or 'hoes' and which ones seem friendly. We waste a lot of time.. and also I have an ego problem of me not wanting to be seen running around mindlessly opening girls at the bar without caring about rejection. I mean I don't care about the rejection -- but nonetheless, I want a productive night, not another night of blowouts.

We'll pretty much take our time at the bar… and when some girl we finally both think is hot comes along.. and approachable, we'll go in. It's always situational. I have bad experiences with going direct -- unless the situation allows itself -- usually there has been some good eye contact beforehand.

I try to say something witty, and usually I'm good about that. I get the girl's attention within a few minutes and am making observational stuff. I do cold reading too -- like guess her personality or what 'sign' she comes across as. That stuff always works out well in getting that initial spark of attraction. Even shit tests don't bother me. I can cut through them in those initial few minutes. My improv is also pretty good… I can continue talking for a few more minutes bringing up random threads.

Then I get to a point where I want her to start talking -- cause I've been doing all the work and I don't want to be a dancing monkey. I'll just try to be 'natural' and ask questions about what they do and where they work… typical nice guy shit. Flex for his part doesn't even do any routines.. he just asks these questions from the beginning. Well needless to say, this is the part where we blowout a lot at.. sometimes we get lucky and get a phone number by this point, but it never goes further. If Flex pulls, it has to be that night - and he has to take the girl to the dance floor first before he makes out with her. But then it's still downhill from there for him.. cause the girls don't call back. Anyway here's the typical scenario I'm getting stuck with:

60% of the time, at a bar… the girls will tell me what they do and where they live… but after a few minutes, they'll leave. They'll want to get back to their friends. "Well, nice meeting you.. I have to get back to my friends now..have a great night".

Talking to them again is really hard after… there is a bit of discomfort in the air, unless I can be funny. Usually by then though, the same girl I opened is now with her friends, so the shit tests are a lot harder and more cockblock. Also if I ask her if she wants to dance, 80% of the time it's a 'no'. The other percent is like.. "Maybe but not right now, or I'm with my friends right now… so sorry." At that point, if I ask for a number or a Facebook close -- I might get the Facebook, but the number is usually a dead lead.

Going back to the original percent.. the other 40% who do invest… sometimes it does lead to a connection. That's a good thing right? Well.. I still have to avoid falling into the 'friend' category.

In my experience so far… if I get to the 40% point, I can get a solid number close. The problem so far this summer has been doing anything higher than a number close. I can get cheap kisses but.. they work against me. I want to get a solid day 2. Kisses for the most part are kisses of death. Especially if there was no comfort in between.

So here are my typical scenarios when I get to 40%… and this is usually how I fuck up:

1) Bar chicks smoke. I don't… that's a problem and I don't want to resolve it by starting smoking. End of set.
2) She's hot, but she's also taken. FUCK this. I can talk to her more and try to be sexual.. but it blows out. And I lose the connection I made. Flex and I run into this A LOT.
3) She's just not attracted even if I'm interesting to her. She just doesn't see me in a sexual way and rejects all the sexual kino stuff.. Friend Zone. I attribute this to just being not 'dressed for the environment' or not having DHVs that she would consider sexy -- tattoos or be in the Navy, ride a bike, etc (that's why I'm doing what I'm doing now).
4) Things go good, but some other dude comes in and ruins the set… hasn't happened a lot.. and Flex never really comes in to wing. ESPECIALLY when I need it.
5) I decide to be direct and kino her a lot. Half the time it works, half the time she gets uncomfortable and leaves. She becomes a girl who doesn't want to talk anymore like above. This happens especially if I kiss her. If it works, I'm really excited and push as far as I can get. Though this seems like a great percentage… it's RARE overall to get this scenario. This has not been the summer of luck..
6) Her friends come in and take her away. I try to talk to the friends like a nice guy -- but they usually are BITCHES..not to mention whales. I still have to work on keeping these girls in set. It sucks a lot. I hate this situation. If I hit on the whale, I lose the attention of the girl I'm gaming.. and it's not a happy ending.

So as you can see, my best option is probably #5. The rest.. not so good, unless I can get the number before hand… which I don't do until I really feel it's solid.. and that's hard to do.

Bar game has sooo many obstacles. The obstacles add up .. especially if I've been opening many different sets and just pure FAILING. I get in my head a lot… and think, ugh fuck the bar. Girls here aren't worth this much effort. I've had a lot of 'dark' days. Flex and I will go home laughing that it was another crap night -- but I'll spend more time at home thinking about it.. ultimately the snowball effect of having night after night of pure suck will eat at me making me feel like not wanting to go out at all. It doesn't help that there's NOTHING else to do in Riverside for the summer. No house parties. School's out. People are working jobs, so you can't call them up to hang out… If you want to have fun.. you're pretty much stuck going to the bar.

---- Thoughts After & Just Enjoying Other Challenges in Life As a Way to Heal -----

It's been tough. I try to be positive just like I preached above. That honestly has been what's been keeping me going strong. That's why I preach it.. it's so easy to get discouraged and just admit defeat. But the cool part about being positive, is that you put yourself out there again and you stay active. Training is tough.. but it's so much better to train than to sit home and hate life.

Taking motorcycle lessons and bartending has been so good for the soul. It allowed me to really face other challenges -- that were just as hard; but at least by staying positive and treating every situation like it was 'practice'.. I was able to succeed in those areas. I failed my motorcycle driving test at first -- but I put myself back out there by practicing more for hours on end. Eventually the instructor was very impressed and said I was ready to take the test again. I look forward to passing this week. It's a challenge but I have a great attitude towards it.

Bartending class has been great too. The instructor there is kinda like a PUA, but not really -- he's just a natural. He's been through a lot of shit.. but he's so great at picking himself up and staying cool and positive that you just ultimately love him and want to be like him. He's so great with witty comebacks. He can make people laugh effortlessly. He's quick at making all the drinks and can upsell like no other - making hundreds of dollars a night. In fact, that was his advice to us all.. "if you want to survive in this biz, you gotta be QUICK, and UPSELL". Not just quick in your drink making skills but also quick on your feet.

"A lot of people in the real world take your shit for granted. They think they can do what you do… because you make it look so easy… so they downplay you and sometimes don't even want to pay you," he said. "You have to have the balls to stand up for yourself and show them, you ARE the big swinging dick. If you're not a dick to others sometimes when you need to be… you AINT getting paid" he said. I took that to also mean "you AINT getting laid". :)

"Treat every person like you really care about them.. they're like your best friend", he went on to say.. "Inside you don't give a shit about them.. they're just another customer at the bar… UNTIL they start tipping you. Then you care about them EVEN more".

I loved this part -- it was like classic PUA speak -- reward good behavior. So often, I get judgmental.. and I approach sets with a negative frame of mind.. like it's going to fail or I'm going to have to battle… and I expect a blowout. I often think too.. "Oh this girl is just a bar girl.. the trashiest of trash.. why even bother." It's such a bad frame though to start with… I know NOTHING about that girl until she starts opening up to me. If she starts opening up, I SHOULD REWARD her by CARING about what she's saying and NOT being judgmental. But at the same time, yeah it's no big deal if the set goes bad -- "she's another customer at the bar…"

Learning to make the drinks has been fun… I really feel way more knowledgeable about the stuff that's out there, and now if I buy a girl a drink, I can talk about it and make it seem super sexy. Once I get my bartender license, I plan to exploit this in every way possible * evil grin *.

My only beef with bartending school has been the girls. Everyone is taken. Pretty much everyone in the school is a couple, and couples take this class together. I was like -- hmm mental note to self -- after I get a girlfriend, this is probably an activity I can do with her together to build emotional connection.

----- Online Fun -----

But, finally, I have some good news for you all.. so those of you who've been reading so far, I thank you, and for those of you who haven't … well fuck ya'll!! :D (Some of you might have skipped around tho -- I would too lol..) In all seriousness -- things have gotten better. It's this attitude of being positive that I've been talking about.

I sorta experimented with online game for a while.. during the dark days. I got a TON of rejection at first. I'd send out creative messages or compliments and get NO response. I'd try going direct. Nothing. I started saying random stuff and still nothing. I was on both PlentyofFish and OKCupid - both free sites -- really working it. My friends (outside of game) recommended OKCupid because they said a lot of couples they knew had used the site.

I was frustrated with the lack of response. But I just kept going.. until finally I got a response! One girl said I was CUTE for a change. It felt so good to hear that… She wasn't really my type though, I just messaged her because my fail rate was so high I didn't care anymore. But it got me happy -- and better yet -- creative. I messaged her back and we had a few exchanges. She wants to meet up. We're still trying to figure out when.. :)

I also studied the conversation I had with her and applied it to some other girls on the site. I got more responses! It was so awesome. I met 3 more girls, and this time they were all at least 7s or higher. Badass!

2 of the girls I met have been messaging me back and forth for the last few days. One is a cutie Korean, the other is an Indian girl who's looking for arranged marriage (yikes). The Korean is really fun to talk to, and very attracted to the fact I do bartending. She's down to meet up to have some drinks together and watch k-drama on top of it. I just need to get her to decide on a date -- she's been shit testing hard (I'll post up the conversations in the next post to study).

The Indian girl is really awesome… she's like what my parents would want in a girl. She's a doctor, she's from our same background, a Hindu, she even likes Japanese stuff like me… O_O. Yet, for some reason -- I fear dating her -- because it would lead to marriage. I know she's expecting that. I also don't know if I want to marry an Indian girl… dating is okay, but I don't want to settle down and give in to all things traditional. So I'm keeping her to the side. Good thing she lives in NY.

The 3rd girl is HOT. But maybe too hot. I think it could be a spammer. She is a nude model, but she says just for 'art', not erotic or anything. She said she had to 'say that' first to get it out of the way to see if I would still be cool about it. So I said to her, "I like sex, and I wanted to get that out of the way.." to see if she was cool about it. I told her I didn't care if she was a nude model, as long as she was doing something she liked. So we'll see how that goes.. :P

Update, there's a 4th girl now. :) I'm starting to get the hang of this online dating thing. I hated it at first because it was so annoyingly hard. But that positive attitude is what helped me out -- staying positive allowed me to be creative and witty. You can't do that in a negative frame. I'm going to post some breakdowns for my next post. Like I said earlier, I'll also post some of the transcripts. Hope that can help others.

Things are looking up! Keep ya posted..

- Cloud

Using Twitter for Social Circle Game 7-23-10

Do any of you guys use Twitter? I've been using it more proactively in the past few days -- after my brother showed me how to use it to keep up with stars and musicians we both like.

At first, my reaction was like… er, why do I want to follow musicians and stars? Isn't that like what creepy people do? Stalk others? But then I realized.. man I am totally missing the 'big picture'…

Twitter is an AMAZING tool that can get you into some of the most exclusive social circles out there. All you have to do is 'talk' to the stars. And they'll reply back! WTF!? I was super surprised when I found this out.

Plus, whenever you meet cool people who ACTUALLY know how to use Twitter, you can follow them and learn along. Some people have some really cool Twitter profiles -- like this one guy from Firefox and Ashton Kutcher. I have already started following over 140 movie stars, celebs & famous people.

It's awesome, because you don't really get to talk to these people in 'real life' day to day.. so with Twitter, you suddenly do. That's the coolest part to me… in my regular social circles .. I don't really get a chance to meet interesting people. A lot of people here in Riverside are ghetto and boring, only down to smoke weed or something. With Twitter, you get a chance to hear what these talented people have to say, and not only that -- you learn how they think too -- which is awesome, because I firmly believe that talent is contagious.

When you hang in social circles that lower your intelligence -- you don't really feel motivated to do anything special. When you hang out with 'smart' people, you feel smarter. You feel motivated to do creative stuff. After spending a lot of time on Twitter following different celebs and cool people, I feel like I have gotten smarter. I feel also like, I have more opportunity too. I not only started following celebs, but also business people -- CEOs, Managers, Directors of Marketing, etc. I have chances to talk to those guys and see what they're up to. I follow technologically savvy guys -- and improve my own technological savviness. My blogging skills are better. My Twitter skills are better and I know more about important topics going on in the world. I can use these things as discussion points to meet new people situationally -- and become their friends. They in advert follow me as well, and I am able to create my own fanbase. It's really cool and awesome for social proof. I love telling a girl to be my Twitter fan.. :D It gives me like 'celeb' status or something.

But yeah, you know.. if you get good at using Twitter, and you apply it to the work you do -- one of my friends is modeling -- if he made connections with other models on Twitter -- he could probably network himself into some EXCLUSIVE modeling social circles, and have WAY more opportunity than just hanging out with the same crowd he always hangs out with. (He's really cool tho, I doubt he would sit around bored all day.. right Sifu?)

I intend to use Twitter for networking and getting into better social circles. When I went to NY last year in December, I went to a mixer for the company called Mashable. It's a huge social media blog. I noticed right away that everyone was on 'Twitter' and they told me to follow them. At that time, I just assumed they had some big ego and didn't care for them. But if I maintained that connection now, I probably could have still been in contact with some cool guys in NYC and may have had more opportunity to do projects there. So yeah man.. don't dis' Twitter.

Finally, for the PUA scene, I could see how Twitter could get you some hot girls. Think about it.. if you get yourself into exclusive social circles, there are bound to be HOT girls in them too. Rich guys chase hot girls.. and invite them to major parties… if you want to be in on that.. you need to befriend these CEOs, managers, etc and go to their big club parties. You could be their photographer for these events or manage their blogs… and they'll love you for it.

Well, think about it guys… Twitter is an awesome social circle builder. You heard it here first :) Keep it in mind and go far with your life goals.

Best of luck,

- Cloud

Some Mental Notes

Hey gang, haven't posted a report lately, but plan to soon. I'm currently in school! YEP, you heard that right. This week I started motorcycle lessons and have already learned how to kick my bike into 2nd gear! Next up, riding through curves while keeping the bike from falling over! Yup.. it's crazy, but crazy fun. I'll write about it at some point.

I also enrolled in Bartending school. Class starts tomorrow. That should be hella fun. Today I talked to my advisor on the phone. She was kinda cute sounding -- and told me I should come prepared to learn and avoid hitting on the women there. Ummmmm.. what??? We ended up flirting a bit with each other on the phone and while it was okay, I could have been smarter. This is where the 'mental notes' stuff comes in... In the moment, I think it was okay .. but if I ever did it again, I would have been yet another victim of being labeled as 'creepy'.

Here's what happened:

- She's talking to some other people in the background when I ask her for class time and address. She then says in the phone "You're leaving already?!!"

- I realize she was talking someone else, but she immediately thinks I mistook her and laughs -- oh I'm sorry I was talking to a co-worker here, I didn't mean to say that to you! Plus, I haven't given you your answer yet.. so don't leave! Hahah"

- So I told her, "Wow you guys sound like you have too much fun over there...I think class is going to be so much fun :D"

- She says: "Oh you have no idea!! Haha, it's so much fun here, you're going to have a great time, but remember you're here to learn, not hit on the girls okay??"

- I think to myself -- lol omg.. what do I say to that? So I say, "Haha.. if push comes to shove, I might end up doing so..."

- She says "LOL, no no, that's sexual harassment -- at least while you're in class... outside is .. different hahahah".

- I say "Lol... in that case I better wear my court restraining brace tomorrow."

We laugh and end the conversation with her giving me the address and time tomorrow.

I think to myself -- lol that went alright but.. I almost came off 'creepy'.

She basically framed me as a potential "sexual harassment case". Not only that, I fell for it by saying "Yeah, I'm going to hit on the girls tomorrow..." when she told me specifically not to. Finally, I added fuel to the fire by saying I needed to bring my court restraining brace.

Talk about retarded conversation, Cloud.

> What I should have done:

It would have been better if I had reframed everything as her hitting on me...and I might possibly become a victim of sexual harassment... then I could have avoided the 'creep' frame and looked 'innocent'.

Like when she said -- "you're here to learn, not hit on the girls..", I could have said:

"I hope to god I can learn.. I really want to be a good student, so do your best to not be distracting tomorrow okay? :)"

When she said:

"...that's sexual harassment..outside of class okay?"

I could have said:

"Oh my virgin ears.. I hope I don't get sexually harassed outside of class too!"

As long as I was funny about it.. I'm sure it would have worked way better. At least I would have maintained the attraction spike while avoiding the 'creep' frame. When I just admitted I might hit on the girls tomorrow - I fell into her 'trap'. So if my conversation going forward with her or any other girl in class goes weird -- I'll definitely get labeled a creep. She still keeps her value because she 'TOLD' me not to hit on anyone -- even though she was the one who started the 'game' by being flirty with me.

So yeah, mental notes. Reframe the girl as the one leading you on, and pretend to resist her until she's so horned up you guys make out and have passionate sex somewhere. Then you can still say she 'harassed you' and she's 'creepy' lol... although it's done in humor not seriousness :)

- Cloud

World Cup Kiss - Live TV

What a fucking EPIC kiss. So awesome. Go Casillas!

For Fun :P

Lolz... Nintendo Condoms. What an ingenious idea! Now the practice of safe sex can be something to look forward to! :P

Full article at:
http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/48727708.html

Go Green Ranger! Go! (Kiss Scene)

No matter how many kiss scenes I see, I always come back to this one -- did any of you grow up watching Power Rangers? Growing up everyone kept wondering when Tommy & Kimberley would get together. When they kissed for the first time, everyone in my school was talking about it for weeks! -- I was still in 5th or 6th grade at the time, but even til this day I remember that time as clear as bell and yeah it's still one of the most romantic first kisses ever.

I love this routine, so simple... put her hand in yours, and go in. Go Green Ranger! Go! Tommy was definitely a hero for the ages!

More Date Fail :)

How to Turn A Girl on the Dance Floor

FR Kicked out at the Branding Iron 7-7-10

Fuse and I went there last night with the rest of CCIE; but we got kicked out because Fuse wears a turban. Apparently it's against the Branding Iron's dress code to have hats -- but forget the fact that there's a ton of guys already inside wearing cowboy or bro hats.

We tried to explain to them that it was a religious thing, he couldn't take it off. Instead of listening, they called in their manager who came across VERY ignorant. He said that if Fuse didn't take his 'hat' off, we'd be kicked out. We stood our ground and explained once more it wasn't a 'hat' it was a turban. The manager didn't want to listen so we called him out for discriminating. He said he had the right to do so. It was his private property and he could refuse service to anyone. "IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, YOU CAN LEAVE", he said.

Well, we ended up leaving. It was after this I thought about what kinds of shit we as PUAs have to endure. There's all this talk about being true to your identity -- but I can see why so many guys abandon their own culture, religion, upbringing as they take their PUA journey. If you want to 'fit in' at places like bars and clubs -- you need to check your beliefs at the door and take on the club's values and persona. I can see how a lot of guys would start believing their own sense of self is 'worthless' and inferior to the identity of a successful dude at the club getting laid because he follows their norms. Fuck that.

I don't know about you guys, but I believe that true strength comes from sticking to your own beliefs and being who you really are. Then you'll meet the women you really want to meet. I think women are attracted to strength of character more than anything -- that's why they shit test so much. If you just have trouble talking or closing, or setting things up; that's what the community is for. Your beliefs should be your own. Anyway, I probably am going to boycott Branding Iron -- I don't tolerate ignorance/racism and if you also don't tolerate it -- you should bounce too. There's plenty of other places in Downtown Redlands, IE that have hot girls and clubbing -- and I doubt all those places would be racist too, but if they were -- fuck it I don't care -- there's girls everywhere -- going to one or two shitty bars doesn't have to be the only way to find chicks.

On that note, we had a pretty chill night afterwards -- ran around bouncing from dead club to club before we finally relaxed at the Mediterranean Cafe in Riverside. Look forward to the next fun night!

- Cloud

Date Fail #1

For those of you guys out there who read this blog -- what's wrong with this guy's approach? How would you have done differently? Be specific. Best comment wins a prize :)

Things to Do 7-7-10

Now that AX is over -- what's next?

- Vacations/Trips - "Go out, it's summer - get laid"

1) SM Concert
2) Friend's Graduation Party in NC
3) NY Trip (should plan for when Sparrow gets back)
4) PUA summit (sept)
5) Labor Day Holiday
6) Vegas Trip with Flex
7) Continue 100 Day Sarge Challenge

- Self Dev Stuff "Make Money, Build Body, Get Smart, Move Away - Travel More"

1) Filming & Writing
2) 1kyuu - prep for next AX
3) P90x - look good for sarging/bed
4) School - Motorcycle/Bartending/Film
5) Networking (Research Online for Mixers/Events)
6) Interviewing
7) Personal Blog
8) PUA projects - Travel Guide, Partnerships, Affiliate Marketing

Life Report & Anime Expo 7-6-10

Sup guys!  Hmm where do I start?  So much to talk about…

This past week as some of you know, I spent working at the Anime Expo fair in Downtown LA.  What an experience!  Probably the best experience in a long time.  I not only got to go to an event I enjoy, but I also made lots of new friends, met Japanese stars & musicians, was an MC/translator on stage in front of thousands of people, and was wined and dined every step of the way with VIP treatment including all meals paid for and a pimp hotel room!  Can't wait to work again next year!

So I'm sure some of you are thinking -- Anime?  Why anime?  What does that have to do with Pickup?  Did you pickup anime girls??  Lol.

Well, honestly my trip wasn't about picking up girls.  It was all about self-development for me.

Now that doesn't mean girls weren't in my weeklong adventure.  There were a ton of girls I met, and it was so easy to meet them too -- naturally.  I didn't have to try to create any 'commonalities' -- we already all had something in common -- wanting to be there at AX.  Every girl I talked to was really excited to be there - be it working on staff, or in anticipation of some Japanese star concert, or some anime showing -- it was very easy to just be situational and open girls left and right.   Yes -- even the gorgeous ones.   You could open situational, find out her anime 'schedule' for the week (e.g. what panels, concerts she was seeing) , number close and then text her to meet up later with you at the panels you both liked.  To me, that's the best way to meet girls -- be somewhere you both like (like on vacation or something) and just go to all the fun activities lined up together.

However, like I said -- it was a trip for self-development.  Some of you guys who know me, know that I'm really bored with my current life.  It's way too fucking comfortable.  My buddy Sparrow called me up earlier the week before and tried to convince me to DROP everything and just go to NYC.  Throw away my job, my house, my money -- everything -- just start anew like he and my buddy Rufio have done.  He felt that I could probably get back to the same position I'm at here in Riverside in NYC in less than a year.  It was a very moving speech -- over the phone.   As much as I want to throw everything away -- reality is a fucking giant elephant in my path.  I can't escape the monthly house payment, car payment, etc -- if I threw away my job -- I'd be broke on top of that.  The elephant would transform into Godzilla if my parents had to inherit any of those burdens.

Hence, I can't throw stuff away.  But I am moved -- to the point I need to be putting myself out there 100%.   In the past few months, I started putting myself out there -- taking on more activities -- doing stuff beyond work and sarging.  I helped my friend film a movie -- his first -- watch the movie "Saranghae Nikita" on Youtube (I have a cameo).  That was awesome -- I had always wanted to do something like that and was proud I jumped in and did it.  The experience was incredible.   After that, I got myself a camera and made a short-film of my own using my laptop and iPhone.  A lot of friends have said to me to start my own business. I've taken that idea seriously and put a lot more time into my blog; researched stuff like affiliate marketing (as you can see I have ads on my site now) and put a lot of effort into writing quality material.  I teach pickup too, and have demoed in field -- which helps the page views for this blog -- and so I can say that my views are going up and I have a loyal group of followers now who come back to read often.  Much thanks to you guys who follow!   It's a small start, but I hope to see it grow into something big someday.  I also hope that my 'blogging' skills improve along with my film skills -- as I hope to turn those things into something big too.  Partnering with other companies is sorta the next level for me to take my skills (the ones I already have) and make them into something more..

Working at Anime Expo was kinda like that next step of 'something more'.  I love Anime.  You all know I studied Japanese and one of the main reasons was to watch anime and play games that never get released in the US.  I also desire to be a part of the industry -- doing anything I'm already good at -- marketing, selling, talking to people about the stuff I like.  I also want more -- possibly the opportunity to translate, or work with stars, as I grow as an individual -- I want my career to allow me the room to 'move up' and do these fun things.  That's why I think an industry like the Anime industry, Hollywood, or anything creative/film/design related would be perfect for me to work in.

It was pretty easy for me to get a job at AX this year.  A year of practicing pickup has prepared me to deal with any kind of interview thrown my way.  Let's just say I knocked their socks off.  When I started my first day of work, I decided right then and there -- I wanted them to shit test me.  Give me HARD stuff to do.   That's how I started my 'journey'.   I wasn't overly arrogant or cocky about it -- just very confident in myself.   I stated over and over to my bosses -- give me any project; I'll do an awesome job with it.

So they began giving me small jobs --> Go get water for the staff.  Done.  Next.  Go deliver these boxes to the A/V department.  Done.  Go take these clients around and make sure they reach their panel on time.  Done.

Every time I got a project, I'd tell them I could do it, and I could get it done in the timeframe they wanted.  Then I demonstrated it.  That earned the management's trust.  But that itself wasn't enough -- these were all odd small jobs I was getting.  My other staff members would sit around the office, do these odd jobs a couple times during the day and then otherwise take phone calls or assist people coming in looking for some exhibit hall.  Some of these staff members looked really bored.  I learned quickly that if I sat around bored and just did what I was told to do -- I'd be sitting there all day.

So I began socializing.  A LOT.  Just like in a bar or a club setting.   In fact at the office, I spent a lot of time just walking around, doing the odd jobs, and meeting new people in different departments.  I flirted with a lot of girls -- got to practice teasing, twisting stuff (without making it too sexual), did some role-play (I sparred with this one girl who likes Judo), and went on several instadates shopping during break together.   I think I read this once by a post from Gareth Jones from CC -- the art of flirting is a MUST.  If you can flirt with people, especially girls -- where you play the game of kinda teasing, kinda being niceguy, and what not -- they open up really well to you.   From there, you can learn a lot about office gossip, who's who in the entire network -- especially who has the power -- and most of the time, if these big guys with powerful positions see that you have a lot of girl friends; they think you're a socially elite guy yourself and give you the time of day.

There were a lot of sets that also went sour -- I was constantly calibrating just to sharpen my flirting skill.  I need it to be up, up, up!  My goal is to have this shit down and flow like water.  I threw out a lot of false time constraints -- especially if I noticed a set may not be warm yet -- I'd come back to it later after doing a bit of a mini open.  There was one girl -- let's call her TAB (trendy asian bitch); who was like on auto-pilot -- she was a hottie and knew it.  A lot of guys would talk to her, but she'd shoot them down within seconds by acting indifferent or very cold.  The reason?  She was probably used to getting what she wanted all her life and not having to do much work for it.  Because she was pretty - she had options, and the guys who tried the hardest would get her attention.  This set initially went sour to me.  But a new thing I've been trying is the ability to ENDURE.  It's really powerful.  Like just keep letting yourself get shit tested -- and no matter what be able to smile and keep yourself in state.

I saw a bunch of guys try to talk to her -- some guys acted really nice; she'd act bored or make them do stuff for her without giving any attention back.  Other guys tried to play 'cocky/funny' on her -- trying to get her to 'rise'.  She seemed like the type who was way used to hearing cheesy pickup lines and cocky routines -- because she'd act indifferent and look away.  She'd even walk away.  It was like if you were a nice guy or a jerk -- it didn't matter -- you'd still get blown out.

So I decided to endure with her.  I didn't care if she liked me or not, I just wanted my own skill at dealing with this type of girl to improve.  My approach was a mix of cocky/funny and nice guy.  I kept it hot and cold with her -- if she got cold, I'd hit her with hot cocky funny stuff -- or even use hot kino.  When she'd jump, I'd wear a smile to let her know it was just fun.  When she got too hot, I'd bring her back down to cold with just plain talking.  My goal was to keep her warm all the time.  I threw in a ton of false time constraints so that I wouldn't overload this set.  Another guy spent too much time getting her hot and made her angry.  She kept calling him a jerk.   In the beginning, I too ran the risk of her walking away.  I said some stuff that would have blown me out for sure -- but the thing that kept me in set with her was the fact I could endure her anger -- if she got to a hot point -- by just being calm and cool.  If I had to say sorry I'd say it -- and not seem chody about it -- just cool.  Eventually I reached a point, where she was comfortable to listen to whatever I said -- even if she was looking away, she was still sitting there hearing me.  Every now and then she'd look at me and give a glance.  Those were IOIs.   Finally, she began opening up after I had spent a lot of considerable time with her -- she was used to me and even began smiling back and telling me stories whenever she felt we had something in common.   It was great practice and an easy close to get her on my Facebook (I already had her number from work).  She GLADLY gave it.. it was a solid close.   With TABs, you mainly need to endure and you need lots of time/comfort.   I walked away from that set with a lot more experience in the ability to endure shit.  That would help me -- for even later …. but back to the regular story (cause I kinda diverged -- as I said before, this week wasn't about the girls necessarily).

Thanks to socializing.. I was able to find out what opportunities were available within the organization.  Anytime there seemed to be a 'problem' -- and there were a TON, I would ask people who I was already familiar with if I could help out in any way.  One thing about AX, is that even though from the outside it seems so well managed and draws 10's of 1000's of people yearly; is that it's run by a bunch of kids aged 18-late 20s.  Most of the managers are in their 20s, and communication between departments is not something everyone is good at.  Therefore, you have a lot of 'uh-oh' moments.  I was REALLY surprised.  I expected AX's top level management to be more heavily involved in the decision making and organization of large scale events.  A lot of the panels have TOP BRASS actors or singers from Japan coming in.. and they are televised and/or put on Youtube for the whole world to see.   Yet, these panels are managed by kids -- (that too, we're all volunteers -- because AX is nonprofit), and some of these kids sleep in or don't come to work on time.   WTF?

That was how I got my first big job -- someone didn't really pay attention to scheduling and was absent from a panel -- supposedly he needed to host the panel.  So I volunteered to do it -- I could do it because I'm so used to being in front of people all the time, I could display that confidence.  So they gave me the job.  It was exhilarating.   I had 15 minutes to spare and had to read a script so I could memorize the names of the actors.  The program manager also debriefed me on what to tell the audience; a la whether photography was allowed or not, when to allow for questions; and at what time to end the program.   The rest was up to me -- I had the freedom to be MC.   Definitely as far as game -- this took my game to another level.  I thought I was good, but man -- dealing with large audiences is a true next level challenge for the common PUA.

You have to be able to get the audience up in state.  The fact I had star power behind me made that sorta easy for my first panel.  I just read his bio and the audience cheered tremendously.  I read it in small chunks so that the audience could digest what I was saying and continue cheering -- the more they cheer, the more they get excited.  You can also ask questions to the audience -- like "who's excited for this?" to boost their state.   That sorta stuff is fun.   After I got the audience happy, I brought the actor on stage -- and of course he took the rest on very naturally.  The second part of my job was to walk through the audience and allow them to ask questions.   Management wanted me to control the questions to 1 question per person, while observing time.  Some fans were super crazy -- one girl tried to push past me and give a teddy bear to the actor -- she wanted it signed.   Signing wasn't allowed at this panel -- it was reserved for the next.  But that was my first challenge -- I pulled her back and told the audience to wait till the next panel for signing.  Then she tried to guilt trip the actor -- and got the audience to cheer for her signing.  While I was holding the mic, my program manager was running around frantically behind cameras saying "NO! Don't do it!"  I made eye contact with the actor and he seemed okay with it.  So I let her through and get her signature.  Then I immediately controlled the room with "All other signatures at the next panel".  Everyone cheered the girl got her signature and was complaint with the rules.   Throughout the panel -- I kept getting cue cards of what next to say or when to control time -- some stuff changed in the middle -- I thought I had till 12:45 to run the show, but then time was cut, because the artists wanted to do a special game with the audience.  I had to be quick thinking on my feet there too in interacting with the crowd.

All in all, my first panel went off very well.  The entire program team, staff and Japanese actors were pleased it was a success.  The panel even got the most attendance and was the talk of the day.  As a result, I got offered another panel for later in the day.  Rumors also circulated I knew Japanese, because I was talking to the actors.

My next panel put me as the MC again.  This time around, I decided to peacock -- I wore a PUA hat and dressed better.  It definitely helped me -- people by the end of Anime Expo began asking to take pics with me -- that's how they remembered me.   I got the audience very excited, brought the actors on stage and then took questions from the audience.  I also demonstrated I knew Japanese by helping with translating to the official translators on staff.  That was fun.   After the show, my rep was pretty much established as a capable MC, and job offers kept coming.   I did some amazing panels -- and got to meet really famous people -- I can't really tell you who they are on here -- cause I'm Cloud and I'm supposed to keep identities all secret so-- just ask me in person if you ever meet me or one of my wings who knows me.

After that, life was pretty good.  That girl I mentioned earlier? She definitely opened up now… she knew about what I was doing and thought it was very cool too.  Another thing with TABs is that they are very much attracted to social status and stuff like 'peacocking'.  I remember her telling me my clothes and hat looked very good.  My bosses also were getting a lot of attention because they hired me.  So I made them look good too.  I still had to do some odd jobs every now and then -- like get lunch for the team from outside; or help cut out sheets of paper for questionnaires -- but I did them without griping -- so that made me look like I was still very much one of the guys without a 'big head'.  I still showed I could fit in -- despite the fame -- so that made them very happy.

Outside -- my brother and my friends in real life wanted me to hang out with them at AX.  Since I was really busy reading scripts and memorizing facts about artists, I really couldn't.  I had too much preparation to do.  The worst I could do was be unorganized like some of the other staff.  For the reference though, my department was the best organized.  We had some great people on staff.  But from time to time, I'd take a break and just hang with my friends for an hour in the exhibit hall to shop around for anime t-shirts and stuff.  Went to a few concerts also -- had front row seats -- definitely living the VIP life.  My friends and brother to say the least, were quite astonished.   Swirl came -- my dancer friend who can outdance anyone in SoCal.   I sorta was at risk with him though, 'cause he wanted to get in free and kept pestering me to lend him a pass to get in.  He got in finally on his own accounts -- but I was afraid if I helped him I'd ruin my rep.  So glad things turned out alright though.

Finally, the last big challenge came to me -- the mother of all events --a Costume Show.  It's basically held on one of the final nights of AX, and is a long several hour event, with live TV, on stage in front of 10s of 1000s of people.  My assignment really made me nervous.  I was originally hired to MC -- but last minute they needed a translator; so they put me up to translate on stage instead!  The worst part was -- there wasn't any rehearsal or schedule to follow!  I was given a star to work with and pretty much told to just translate on the fly for him.

This guy was really eccentric too.  He was a big-shot and knew it.  He had an attitude.  When I talked to him, he pretended he knew English really well and didn't need translation.  He had been working for several years as a judge for the show.  I didn't know what to expect -- I had never been to the show myself.  He told me he'd only call on me if he needed me to say something really important.  Well, it turns out -- this guy wasn't that good at English -- and relied heavily on me to figure out what was going on during the show.  We spent a considerable amount of time in Japanese -- and at some points -- my Japanese level was truly challenged - I'm good but not anywhere near fluent.  I began feeling nervous -- like I wasn't going to do a good job with this project.   He kept expecting me to do a good job too.  At one point, he even 'graded' me… he said "I'd give your Japanese ability a B-".  T_T  It was probably true though -- some of the stuff he said went way over my head -- especially when he got very technical.  That was difficult -- I realized then -- fuck -- I better really study hard and learn more vocab if I want to keep doing this.   As I got nervous, I realized my conversation in Japanese started to suck too -- I began making incomplete sentences and butchering words.  He looked at me as if I was retarded from time to time.  I told him I was still learning which sorta made him annoyed.    I got more nervous and kept thinking I was going to fuck up the show.   I used a lot of state control exercises to keep myself in check -- so I would be calm and relaxed.

The show for the most part went off well -- it was actually really enjoyable.  There were a lot of performers, who came up on stage dressed as their favorite characters.  They then performed scenes from some anime or manga and acted it out to the audience.  The judges, including my guy, were very entertained.  Of course, my guy said egotistical stuff like "very good, but never will be as good as Japan".  Err.   After all the performances, the judges all got together in a room to decide.  My guy decided to go to the bathroom instead.  When he got back, he was like "Oh, I'll just pick this contestant -- they were the coolest" -- he didn't even put a lot of thought into it.  We let time run out till the very last 5 minutes -- when he decided he wanted to give a speech too.  It was a long one -- and I had no idea what he was saying at some points -- but I quickly wrote shit down and put something coherent together.  He kept trying to change it too which was annoying.  Then we were rushed on stage.

The backstage folk told us to just go up and talk.  So he said the whole speech he had told me -- and parts of it didn't match what I had written down; he had changed it again.  FUCK.  I translated but it came out kinda poor.  He looked confused when the audience laughed.  So he asked me why, and I told him to keep going.  He said some more stuff which matched part of what I wrote down, so I just read what I had written down.  Audience began to cheer -- whew!   THEN -- he announced the winner of the contest.  UH WTF?  The people backstage pulled us back furiously and said we couldn't do that.  He didn't get it and began to panic.   I tried to explain to him what was going on but he wouldn't get it and I began feeling nervous again.  My Japanese got weak -- and I began saying shit sentences which made no sense to him.  Eventually he got what I was trying to say so I told him we should go back up the next round, after the judges all finish their 'thoughts' and say we miscommunicated about the winner.  He kept disagreeing and not wanting me to do anything.  I was very unsure what to do.  We were fidgeting  A LOT… and the audience noticed it while we were on stage.  Finally, he just accepted he would let me speak first.  When we went up to the podium, I tried to start off by saying we miscommunicated, but he jumped in and said "NO! What are you saying!!"  The audience let out a huge laugh.  I tried to stay calm and be clear -- but he jumped in again and we looked like we were fighting a bit on stage.  More laughter.  Then the audience began screaming "LET HIM TALK!"  So I did.. and he said stuff I couldn't translate very well in that moment.   It came off very weird -- and so we just ended up announcing the winner again.  That led back to cheering amongst laughter.   I smiled at the audience and walked off sheepishly.

My judge was madd… he wanted me to stay out of the rest of the contest, so I did.  I was pretty much well -- that was a blowout lol… talk about bad set!!  The stage manager came up and asked us what the hell happened.  My judge couldn't explain in English, and wanted to avoid me, but I ended up still having to translate.  The stage manager then surprised us both and accepted full responsibility for the mishap -- saying that there should have been a rehearsal/schedule and apologized profusely for making the judge seem foolish on stage.   The manager had apparently not been given enough staff or time to do the project -- and didn't get time to communicate to my department what the details of the schedule might be.  So we just had to wing it -- and usually there was more lead time; and so the manager apologized to us profusely.  I sorta dodged a bullet -- but I also realized in that moment -- I better study harder from now on.   Next year man -- gotta find a way from now till then to get more fluent!   After the event, we all parted ways, and I didn't see the judge after.  I did get a lot of comments from people leaving the theater and telling me stuff like "RELAX man it's okay! We know you were nervous up there! But you did a great job".  One girl wanted to take a picture with me.  Another guy took a pic with me also.   I felt really embarrassed but I pretended not to care at all and rolled with the punches.  ENDURE. :)

After I explained everything that happened to my department staff -- they also agreed I wasn't at fault; it was the program manager's fault for not being organized.  They said not to worry and that I did a great job despite everything and were really proud.  I felt good they said that; some of the guys I had made friends with offered to take me out for a drink after work.  I took em up on the offer except I had to put my stuff away in my hotel room -- and I forgot I didn't have their number.  So I ended up drinking with my roommate and knocking out.  Btw, my roommate is also Japanese, and doesn't understand English one bit.  But he sided with me and said that the judge should have made the effort to rehearse with me because he has the years of experience -- not the other way around.  So -- I guess everyone was cool.  Man, this is why I loved my time at AX.

Overall, I made a great first year impression with AX; and as far as putting myself 'really out there', I think I've definitely done so.  My dream has always been to have an exciting life and do fun things with it.  I made a ton of friends, proved myself to an international organization, helped them look good, got many opportunities to practice my social skills and improve -- as well as see my own weaknesses as a man.  For that experience alone, I'm truly grateful.  Even though AX is now over, I keep the memory of everything -- and moving forward, I have more skill set than before to work with for the next exciting chapter in my life.  Though the elephant is still in my way, I think after this experience, I come with a way stronger frame than before and sooner or later I'm going to toss that elephant out of my way.  So NYC, Tokyo here I come...  my goals are very clear now -- by putting myself out there and my skill set to the test I can truly grow as not only a PUA but as a man and an individual.

To the next PUA Cloud adventure!

- Cloud